I Spoke Early

     I spoke early. Early and proper. At least that's what my parents would say if you asked them. Somewhere along the way from when I spoke my first words to when I began forming sentences, I developed a speech impediment. I began as a toddler who fluently spoke well above what was expected of me and ended up as a teenager who could barely say her name without stuttering. This would always lead to someone jokingly asking me, "Did you forget your name?' I'd always laugh at their attempt to joke, but inside it hurt to know that I was being ridiculed. The embarrassment that came along with a speech disorder never seemed to fade away. Every time I opened my mouth to speak my thoughts, I'd be reminded of all the previous failed attempts, and I'd force myself to remain quiet. I quickly became the kid in the class who never spoke a word. The teachers knew me as the student who always had good grades but refused to participant. Constantly, I would wish I could find the strength to overcome the impediment so that my thoughts and ideas could add to class discussion. However, my strength never seemed to outweigh my fears.
     To many, such a simple disorder as a speech impediment may not seem like a significant fault, but in a society ran by those with the strongest voices, it is easy to be forgotten among the sidelines. Human beings are social creatures by nature, and to lack such an important social skill such as communication can be detrimental to an individuals living experience. Speech is commonly overlooked and taken for granted. It's seen as something we tend to indulge in with each other to pass time. What people seem to forget is that speech is the backbone of our society. Through the development of speech, the passing of oral tradition, the creation of local vernacular and more, speech has been there to act as a driving force in the advancement of society. If not for speech, ideas could not be expressed from one mind to the rest of the world. This would lead to a huge gap in our growth as a species. To lack skill in such a fundamental aspect creates a sense of inferiority that I can personally say I have experienced.
      Speech has always been a challenge for me, but it was through this challenge that I found my passion. If not for the moments my cheeks burned red with embarrassment as my eyes bore into the ground or the days my stutter was so severe that silence was the only option, I don't think I would have turned to writing. Although my speech impediment made verbal communication difficult, I found another form of communication through written word. I am well aware that I will never be known to have a voice that flows like honey, and suppressing my speech impediment might not be completely possible, but writing has taken some of the pressure off of my shoulders. Just as communication is a driving force in the advancement of society, writing is a driving force behind my well being. It is my speech impediment that I have to thank for that.